As human beings we are born genetically with the DNA of our parents.
We evolve, develop and grow with our experiences , our upbringing, our surroundings and our education.
We develop through nuture and nature and become the people we are, due to everything we see as we grow up.
We have core values and beliefs that make us who we are and we also develop negative core beliefs based on bad experiences, distored thinking and how people speak to us and treat us.
At one stage we reach our teenage years and adult hood with US! With who we are. We are here with our brain, our thoughts, our behavious, our self esteem and thoughts of who we should be that would make us happy.
All of this we create in our thinking, it’s all in our thoughts.
The beauty of mindfulness is it teaches us how to look at our thoughts and realise that actually they are not factual. They can be changed, we can change our behaviours, our reactions, our personalities by looking at us and seeing the changes we need to make.
One of the biggest blockages we have is our self esteem, our self worth, our self belief.
We believe what people tell us..You are not good enough, you cannot achieve this, you will never do that, your look is not good, you are too fat/thin, too stupid, too shy, too confident, the list goes on.
All of this information eventually has massive impact on our self.
So today in my mindfulness Monday I want you to have one moment where you look at yourself and write me a list of…The Value of ME!
Who are you, what are your good qualities, what are you good at, what do you like to do, who are your friends, what do they like about you, why do your family love you, what good things to you bring to others, are you kind, friendly, helpful, loving, fun, talented…Keep writing…
Now look at the list…
Just for now I want you to look closely at the list and listen to your inner voice.
Do you believe all of these things, do you see the value of you, do you see what others see?
I have spent many years looking at myself, I have been so destoyed at times by what people said about me, how they criticised me, how they thought I should behave, I dealt with it by trying to be a people pleaser and a rescurer and changing who I was to get people to like me…Well guess what, it didnt work!
When you run after others and try to fit in or get people to like you all you do is devalue yourself.
You make yourself sick by mentally torturing yourself that you should be different than you are!
Fact..YOU cannot change anyone else, you can only change you!
So take the pressure off yourself to be liked or loved by others.
Focus daily on strengthening yourself. When you focus on you, give yourself time, mentally believe the positives that you have and know that in life the only power you have is the control over is YOU.
Accept that those who love you and accept you as you are…they see your value and they are the only ones who deserve you in their life.
For anyone who does not see your value, criticises you, undervalues you, or someone you try to get approval or love from, I’ve learned all you are doing is wasting your energy.
You are causing yourself illness and adding to the negative distortions in your thinking.
So my message for today is please, please, please fall in love with you, you are the only person you need to impress.
Enough is enough looking for the approval of others you are simply good enough just as you are….
Be Fabulous and have a fabulous Monday.
All my love Bee xxx
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