Monday Mindfulness with Brenda Shankey :Toxic people.
I happen to have had one of those weeks.
While mindfully going through my week I seemed to see and hear some crazy behaviour.
No matter how well equipped you think you are some people completely seem to pull craziness out of the hat and throw an unexpected situation into your day.
Whilst surrounded by such toxic people this week I really try to look at and assess my reaction, thoughts, emotions and behaviour.
We are human it’s only natural to question yourself but when that chaos arrives in the first instance I always go into… REALLY.. WTF… HOW ARE PEOPLE CAPABLE OF SUCH STUFF!
But reality is, they are and shit happens.. Whether we like it or not there will always be story tellers, jealous ones, destructive people, revenge seeking people, complete fantasists, real life crazy folk… Everywhere!
Whilst my first reaction is usually shock, my second is usually looking at the behaviour of the person and thirdly it’s how best do I deal with this?
The upset is when your name is blackened (even when the situation is false), the people indulge in the drama and destruction of your character and gossip spreads to those who choose to believe the false tale yet proceed to share it.
They all say.. Haters gonna hate.. And I’m a great advocate of that.
However why is it after 100 compliments we only remember that one negative, for all those who love us we focus on those who dislike us? Well today I choose not to do this.
You see choosing our behaviour is our choice, and let’s face it we cannot please everyone nor will we anyway.
So time to switch the thinking :
What other people think of me is none of my business.
What other people say about me is none of my business.
If people choose to attack my character, they have the problem, not me.
How do I best cope with toxic people :
Focus on the good people in your life.
Accept the things you cannot change.
Accept others as they are without judgement!
Take time to think properly and assess how best to deal with difficult people (never be a walk over but don’t react in anger!)
Always have a sounding board, a real trust worthy wise person who can help you best deal with life’s challenging people.
Finally see them as a challenge, look at how you can learn from unacceptable behaviour and most importantly be greatful it’s not you!!
In reality life will always throw us all sorts challenges and the true wisdom from all our ups and downs is definitely celebrate the good days, have patience through the tough times and Learn.. Life is for living, learning, laughing and loving.
Remember tho the choice is all yours!
My audio book Be Fabulous has 14 chapters on dealing with life’s challenges. If you want to learn more.
Download at www.befabulous.guru
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